“Effortless”

We all see masters at their craft make things look so easy, like it just comes natural for them.

But everything that seems effortless is almost always the result of an investment of effort so exceptional, it appears non-existent to the observer.

To be one of these people who does extraordinary things “effortlessly”, you need to be committed, focused, and disciplined for a very long period of time in perfecting something you had the seeds for in the first place.

What is that for you?

Master your reactions

Too often, we respond quickly and with a lot of emotion to things.  We wind up making things worse.

Pause before you respond.  

If it’s serious, pause for at least one sleep.

Ask, “will my response make this better and get me closer to what I want?”

Or will your response add to your problems and build even more resistance?  

Observe your emotions, then choose your response from clarity, not impulse.

Growth isn’t passive

“Growing” personally means you increase your capabilities and the value you have to give to others.

Growing means you increase confidence and reduce fear.

Growing means you increase your ability to solve problems and make things work.

Growing means you develop more of the potential that is already inside you, waiting.

But growing doesn’t come by being passive.  It doesn’t come by doing the same things you have always done.  It doesn’t come by just using the knowledge and beliefs you have already.

Growing comes by learning new things – reading and listening and watching and attending.

Growth comes by doing things you have never done, and making space for those things by dropping some things you were doing that have less value or negative value.

Growth comes by stepping out and stepping up, where you wouldn’t have before.

Growth comes by spending time with high-quality people and going to places that are good for you and that inspire you.

Growth is something you do on purpose.  

You have to get after it.

Listen to your body, and listen to your soul.

From “The Pivot Year” by Brianna Wiest – 

When you’re tired, rest.

When you’re motivated, act.

When you’re inspired, create.

When you’re hopeful, leap.

When you’re doubtful, wait.

When you’re ready, go.

These feeling states act as portals of possibility, and when you let them slide by, you choose not to enter the parallel reality it was pulling you toward.

Listen to your body and listen to your soul.

These emotions are rarely random, but instead open and close doors at just the right time.

The Paradox of Choice – last installment

We have been talking about what living in an age of endless choices for what to do, where to work, what to buy, who to be with, etc. etc. can really fatigue us, distract us, prevent us from being present to one thing, and hurt our happiness rather than help it.

Our phones deliver “everything to everyone all the time”.  How’s that working for your mental health?

Let’s explore a few final thoughts.  

The author says every “yes” means a “no” to something else.  I talk about this in my School of Entrepreneurship.  You only have so much time in a day, and lives are made of days.  Saying yes to one thing means you are saying no to something else.  And saying yes to too much, means you enjoy nothing the way you would otherwise.  Awareness of this helps you choose with intention, not anxiety.

Simplicity enhances satisfaction.  Limit choices where possible – routines, criteria, boundaries – to reclaim focus and peace.

More choices don’t guarantee better lives, but clearer priorities do.

The Paradox of Choice part II

In the book the author talks about some people being “Maximizers and some being “Satisficers”.  

“Maximizers” chase the “best” often at the cost of happiness. They spend so much time researching and belaboring decisions. 

He goes on to say regret rises with options.  The more you compare, the more you question – and ultimately second guess your decision.

Is that you?

“Satisficers” aim for “good enough” – and usually feel better.  Is that you?

We need to live in this age of abundance without going nuts with all the options.  As far as I am concerned, just because there ARE all these options, does not mean I need to take advantage or even consider them all.  I need to move smoothly through life without mass distraction.

We’ll talk just a little more tomorrow.

“The Paradox of Choice”

I was looking at a book by Barry Schwartz called “The Paradox of Choice”.  It’s a revealing look at how abundant choices (in careers, purchases, relationships, routines) can overwhelm us, dilute satisfaction, and fuel anxiety.

Isn’t that a paradox!  Abundance is a result of capitalism and all the producers trying to outdo each other in pursuing your business.  But now, we have so many choices that they can make our life worse if we try to consider all of them.

Schwartz says that the answer isn’t more freedom – it’s smarter limitations.

We can get “freedom overload”, where more options paralyze decision-making instead of empowering it.

What do you think?  Can too many choices have you spending too much time considering them?

Let’s talk more about this tomorrow.

“6 Merit Badges”

Recently a Scout Leader asked me to write down six merit badges that mean the most to me – subjects that made a significant difference in my life.  I am an Eagle Scout.  For those that do not know, there are well over 110 merit badges a Scout can earn.  To become an Eagle Scout you need 21, but about half of them have to be the right ones – “required merit badges”.

A merit badge is just a field to learn about.  There are requirements, and things you have to study and things you have to do to get each one.  I had 56 merit badges.  I was an ambitious young feller.  But these are the six most significant subjects I put on my list.  (The descriptions are mine.)

Entrepreneurship – Creating a business, finding customers and delivering value.  Income and expenses.

Personal Management – Know how to manage your personal finances – spending, saving and investing.

Salesmanship – Whatever you have, you have to be able to sell it, and sell enough of it to meet your goals.

Inventing – Creating something new to solve problems and win customers.  I have 34 patents, so it has meant a lot to me.

Communication – Getting your point across to various audiences in various ways.

Energy – One of my businesses is “Dr. Energy Saver”.  We make homes more comfortable and energy efficient.

Those were my top six.  What subjects have been important in your life?  What do you need to know more about and do better at?

Avoid Lifestyle Inflation

Lifestyle inflation is when you spend more and more on how you live, and it increases at a rate as fast or faster than your income.

As an extreme example, we all know people who made a lot of money and are broke. There are famous ones like 50 Cent and Mike Tyson that show us that being broke is not just a factor of how much money you make, but also how much you spend in relation to it.

Now I get it.  When your income is low and you make a bit more, spending that bit more can make a significant difference in your life.  But if you always spend as much as you make forever, then you will always be living paycheck to paycheck.

The things we can spend money on are infinite.  Often we think something will make our life better, and it doesn’t for longer than a day, or five minutes.  Sometimes our purchases make our life worse.

There is nothing wrong with goals and wanting to do better.  Playing a better offense is a good thing.  But no matter your income, it’s easy to spend it all – or more.

If our lifestyle consumes all our pay, then when there is a hiccup in the cash flow, we are in trouble.  If we dig a hole, then it will take a long time to get out.  

You can’t outwork a bad diet

I work out to stay in shape and stay healthy.

But I have to remind myself that working out and then eating sugar, chips, fast food, bread, fried food, etc. is, well – dumb.

If I eat badly, I can never work out enough.  

But if I workout some AND eat well, I can get results and maintain them.

Self-discipline is the key.