Love – The greatest leadership tool – PART 14

My Gratitude Book

For years, when people wrote me a letter of thanks or email or note that they appreciated my leadership or working at my company or something I did for them, I three-hole punched them and saved them in a binder. I had multiple binders full of such notes. When the fire took them away, I began again. In 5 years, I have accumulated two fat binders of such letters.

If I lose my way, or feel like I am low on the meaning of why I do what I do, I scan some of the papers and card stock in one of my Gratitude Books. It reminds me of how I have the power to touch lives and make them better. It’s an awesome power that should not be abused, but used to the fullest while I am here. It is my purpose. The book is responses from individual hearts to how I am doing.

“You can get anything in life you want, if you’ll just help enough other people get what they want.” – Zig Ziglar

Use Your Voice Well

Your voice is how you communicate. It reveals what’s inside you. Use it well. Your volume, your intention, your tone and the body language you have while saying it – it all counts. You can say the words “I believe you can do better” or even “Thank you” and leave the other person feeling lifted or defeated.

Words are part of the communication. How you say them is perhaps even more important.

Love – The greatest leadership tool – PART 13

Be a Person Others Want to Follow

If you have nasty habits, can’t control yourself, are disrespectful to some people, are disorganized and undisciplined, your expression of caring will mean less. Hopefully you’ve heard others say, “Coming from you, it means a lot.” Be a person of value, and your words will mean more.

If you started your business because nobody else would hire you, you’ll have trouble getting others to follow you. Nobody is perfect, but get your act together. Work on you when nobody is looking. Keep your standards high, personally and professionally. Be impeccable with your word. Be a source of integrity and honor. When you speak, it will mean something.

Being a disciplined person who has their own life together earns you the right to challenge others to be their best.

PEOPLE CAN’T LIVE ON LOVE ALONE

Obviously, we’re not advocating everyone sitting around holding hands and singing “Kumbaya” all day. Love is not incongruent with high expectations, high performance, discipline and high standards. It’s for you to bring both and balance the two.

Some people need more of one and less of the other, and vice versa. People are different. Bring out the best in your team.

Love – The greatest leadership tool – PART 12

How to kill Love at work.

You’ve spent a lot of time, or will, showing people you care about them and their work and that you appreciate them being here. Then come the tests. Don’t blow it now. Here’s what NOT do to, even once –

Lose your temper. If you feel it coming – go home right away.

Yell at someone, in public or private.

Call people names.

Gossip about someone – they will find out.

Be in it for yourself, and abandon a team member.

Sacrifice a team member to save yourself (with a customer for example).

Take a “leader vs. team” attitude or position.

See yourself as better than anyone.

Mistreat someone for any reason.

Accountability

Team members being accountable to goals, tasks completed, and making their numbers sounds great and there is nothing wrong with it. But to an employee, when the leader says “You have to be accountable” or “Were going to start having accountability around here”, it doesn’t sound very friendly; it sounds like a threat to them. If we’re to be honest, too often it is.

How we express things matters; the words we chose, what our intention is, and how we use our voice. Carrot or stick; be careful. Accomplishing very short term goals at the expense of a positive mutually caring relationship is not a wise trade. Deposits to a relationship take time, patience and purposeful action. Involuntary withdrawals can be sudden and extreme. 

There were times when an employee really messed up; I mean big; I had a cause and an opportunity to really pound them verbally. I didn’t take it. They knew they messed up. They tortured themselves. I actually built them up instead.

These moments are big. They are tests and people are watching. You can’t undo what is already done. Sure, there’s crisis management that needs to be done with customers and property. But when you show grace and love in times when people expect you to freak out, it shows what is really inside you.

When something really bad happens, go calm.

Love – The greatest leadership tool – PART 11

Give Away the Credit

We need to understand that we have the need to be recognized too. Run amuck, we take credit for everything good that happens in our company. In some way it’s true; we set up the circumstances and caused things to happen. But we couldn’t do it without others. A smart leader gives away the credit.

The opposite is to take the credit and not give any to those who worked to get it done. That’s a recipe for having disgruntled people.

When things go wrong, take the blame. Stand in front of your people and say “I’m sorry guys. I didn’t get it done. Maybe I didn’t communicate well or often enough, and maybe I didn’t get you what you need to do the job, or I didn’t train you guys well. But I pledge to do better starting now.” You’ll get people wanting to do more to make it right that way, than by blaming others. 

“Brains on the whole, are like hearts, and they go where they are appreciated.” – Robert S. McNamara

Are we exaggerating or simplifying here? Are there any times when you acknowledge that someone fell down on the job? Well… you hired them and put them in that position, right? If they did well, your inner self would want to take the credit. If they did not, you have to take the blame.

If you ever did need to lay blame on someone, you certainly would not do it in public anyway. People know who did what. Get up there and lead. Show that your ego is not in the way.

“You know how blame is described in the research? A way to discharge pain and discomfort.” – Brene Brown

Love – The greatest leadership tool – PART 10

I’ve got a job to do – where do I find time to do all this loving?

“The way to develop the best that is in a man is by appreciation and encouragement.” – Charles M. Schwab

It’s true. Showing you care takes time. But like anything else, if we recognize the power in it and make it a priority, it gets done. You could set up your environment to make it easy. How? Put note cards and thank you cards on your desk where you can see them every day. If you can see it and it’s within arm’s reach, you make it easy. You’ll look at the pile of notecards and ask, “Did I recognize anyone today?” Maybe you reach for a note card and maybe you send a text or an email or buy a gift or something else.You could put a reminder on your calendar and schedule it each week or even each day until it becomes a habit. Do what you must, but do it. Shower people with recognition, praise and gratitude. It’s part of the job if you are doing it well.

“The greatest humiliation in life is to work hard on something from which you expect great appreciation, and then fail to get it.” – E. W. Howe