Pain is a part of life, but suffering often comes by what we think about it.
When something bad happens, it’s pretty hard to suffer without thinking about it – how much it hurts, how it’s not what you wanted, how it’s unfair, how you didn’t deserve it, and how justice was not served to someone else.
The story you tell yourself, over and over for days, months or years becomes the source of your suffering over the (often one-time) event.
Sometimes, you repress the story, and pushing it back because it hurts. Now the story is just waiting until you are vulnerable to come forward and take control.
Instead, you could let go of the story. Face it, feel it, look it square in the eye, and let it go right through and past you.
Even better, you can make a new story about what happened. You can see how it empowered you, made you stronger, and opened the door to something new and better. Use what happened to make you better. Use what happened and share it with others who are struggling with the same kind of thing.
What happened and what we do with it are two completely different things.
One is over with. The other is always up to us.
A reminder I very much needed this morning 🙏🤙
As I was looking up “The Litany against Fear” from Frank Herbert’s book Dune I found this quote from Shakespeare in Julius Caesar
“Cowards die many times before their deaths;
The valiant never taste of death but once.
Of all the wonders that I yet have heard,
It seems to me most strange that men should fear,
Seeing that death, a necessary end,
Will come when it will come“
And also this morning I read this in a different forum “We suffer more from imagination than from reality.” – Seneca
I love this message. I tend to suffer from my own delusions of an issue. Mostly because I care to much. These days, I tend to not worry so much about things I can’t change or control. I’ve learned a lot lately about how my efforts are channeled. I’m very intentional about my efforts now!
Its all about perspective! I love this concept, its truly up to us how, if at all, we let things affect us. Take control of your life and your experiences, don’t let them control you OR your happiness.
Happy Monday!
Years ago I was unemployed and battling addiction but I refused to let that dictate the rest of my life. I made an effort to find my way forward and to use that as a reference point for how far I’d fallen and I continue to use it as a reminder of how far I’ve come and how differently things could have been, and still could be, if I had a different perspective.
I always thought it would be interesting for a business to reach out to bring support to their customers lives . The effort can only follow up with extended good will.
On February 18th of 2024 I was diagnosed with stage 4 bone cancer in my right jawbone. I had never experienced such pain in my life. On March 25th of 2024 my right jawbone was removed and rebuilt with a Titanium bar and my fibula from my right leg. 8 inches of inner tissue, muscle and nerve was removed from the same area of my right leg to rebuild the inside of my mouth. I was told I would be in ICU for 2-3 weeks and with my determination and faith I discharged in 8 days. I was back at work in exactly 129 days from surgery. On September 26th I had my 6 month Pet Scan and it found 3 more stage 4 lymph node tumors in the left side of my neck. I never gave up. In total 65 rounds of radiation on my head neck and chest 30 on the right and 35 on the left with 6 4hour treatments of chemotherapy. Radiation at the base of my tongue was more painful than having my jawbone cut out. But I just kept telling myself this to shall pass.
Here I am 6 months after my last radiation treatments and I now have a prosthetic denture overlay which allows me to eat solid food again and its a miracle but I have 100% of all my taste buds back.
My story is a testament that the pain is only temporary and there’s light at the end of the tunnel.
Last Pet scan results July 10th showed no new cancer. I have 1 tumor that shrunk to the size of A BB and we monitor it and pray it stays benign.
When I was 18 years old my dad fell while working to build his own house. It was a simple fall from the second floor balcony to the first floor but it was directly on his head and he was knocked into a coma. He spent 6 weeks in the ICU and 3 months in the hospital and came out with a head injury and a permanent limp. I was working on the house along side him that day and it was a rather traumatic event for me. I had also been working with him full-time on a high-end historic remodel. At that age I was trying to decide what I wanted to do with my life and had nearly decided I wanted to go to college and become an electrical engineer. Well, that day changed the course of my life. I took over the project from my dad at the age of 18 and completed it over the next 8 months. Incidentally the project won awards and was featured in a couple of magazines, something more attributed to the architect than myself. During that time I determined my calling was construction and I went to college and got a 2-year degree in construction technology. That 2-year experience taught me that I would not have enjoyed a 4-year degree in engineering! I left college and went straight back to work in my family’s business. Now here I am, many years later, in charge of the family business and I still have my dad working with me as well as a few of my children. That very hard time gave me clear direction and started me on my current path and with no regrets. Everything that has ever happened to me in my life has led me to this moment and contributed to the success I have achieved. Without life’s hard lessons we would be ill prepared to grow stronger and do bigger and better things. Life is one big classroom in which we are taught lessons and given tests and every time we pass a test we move up to the next level!